youthopian:

Tumblr is the best because the cool kids that go to your school always have shitty blogs

itsbetterthananal:

my brother is 21 years old and a chef in a 5 star restaurant and he still has dinosaur shaped chicken nuggets for dinner every night so dont let anybody tell you how to live your life

dilemmemily:

one time we got a new kid in fifth grade and he walks right in and sticks his hand under the stapler and staples his hand and just looks at the teacher and goes “I’m going to the nurse” and leaves

tinychatter:

the four stages of haircut

1. hatred
2. regret
3. sadness
4. acceptance

istolefrommarcjacobs:

they only part of the national anthem I remember is “And the rockets red glare.” Because that sounds like a cute nail polish color.